In the darkness, Alli Wescott sits quietly on her porch where she's wrapped in the comforts of an Army poncho liner and the Bible. She listens to the sounds of the night, looks at the lights of cars and street lamps in the distance.

"I pray a lot," she said. "I pray for him to come home to me. And this [green camouflage covering] makes me feel closer to him."

Like thousands of other Virginians whose military spouses are serving in Afghanistan and Iraq, Wescott finds comfort in the friendships she has made with other soldiers' wives.

Her husband, Sgt. Brian Wescott, 26, is a Virginia Army National Guardsman stationed in Afghanistan for a year as part of the war on terrorism. He's a member of the Winchester-based 3rd Battalion, 116th Infantry Regiment, 29th Division. The battalion has more than 200 citizen soldiers from Southwest Virginia, including the Bedford-based Company C.

Many of the battalion wives are part of the Army's Family Readiness Groups, which were activated when the troops were called up in February. So far this year, 26 Family Assistance Centers across Virginia have been in contact with 5,614 family members of National Guard soldiers.

Through fund-raisers, phone calls, e-mails and get-togethers, the families offer practical and emotional support to one another and the troops. That includes everything from sending gift packages overseas to sorting through Army paperwork, dispelling rumors and lending a shoulder to cry on.

Nearly every day since their husbands shipped out, Alli Wescott, Kristin Hawkins and Jen Dooley, who live in the Roanoke area, chat on the phone or exchange e-mail or get together to talk about their husbands and the latest news from Afghanistan. The men don't tell them much about their patrols.

"We fuss at them for trying to protect us," Wescott said. "We'd definitely rather know than not."

The women talk about their fears, worries and hopes. They talk about their everyday lives - children, work, shopping and such. They rent videos. And they work on their scrapbooks, which include photos sent by their husbands from Afghanistan, newspaper clippings and family snapshots.

Like many of the guardsmen's wives, they didn't know one another before their husbands were mobilized in February, but they have since become good friends.

Alli Wescott, 27, is a registered nurse. Her husband, who is an Army Ranger, joined the National Guard for the college benefits, but he's been deployed several times since the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks, leaving little time for his real estate classes at Virginia Western Community College.

Kristin Hawkins, 23, works at J.C. Penney and as a firefighter-emergency medical technician. Her husband, Spc. Jacob Hawkins, 26, is a Roanoke police officer. They have a daughter, Cheyenne, 2.

Jen Dooley, 31, is a customer service representative for Northwest Airlines. Her husband, Sgt. Anthony Dooley, 30, is a factory worker who has spent much of his time since Sept. 11 on National Guard deployments. They have two daughters, Lynn, 7, and Hannah, 11 months.

For the women, the most difficult times so far have been when the troops were first mobilized and when they left for Afghanistan in July. They expect the upcoming holidays - the first they have spent apart from their husbands - to be tough as well.

Hawkins will not put up a Christmas tree.

"It just won't be the same," she said. "You don't have to get up Christmas morning and look at it" without your spouse there to share it.

The soldiers' wives cope by staying busy, including redecorating and remodeling their homes, Dooley said.

Wescott misses her husband most on Saturday mornings, when they used to have coffee together.

"That's when the marriage grows, the love flows for us," she said.

All three of their husbands were supposed to leave the Army this year but could not after the Pentagon's stop-loss program was imposed to maintain troop levels. When their unit returns next summer, Wescott and Dooley plan to leave the Army and Hawkins probably will, their wives said.

"We want to have a family, put down roots," Wescott said.

In Afghanistan, the 3rd Battalion is stationed at Bagram Air Base, near Kabul, and in Ghazni Province near the Pakistan border where insurgents have been more active. The soldiers rotate between the two sites.

Hawkins is in Ghazni, while Wescott and Dooley are at Bagram, where many of the soldiers complain about boredom. Wescott and Dooley, however, don't mind staying at Bagram.

"Bored is good," Jen Dooley said.

"Brian would rather risk the boredom and be able to come home and tell" stories to his grandchildren one day, Alli Wescott said.

The women worry most when the men leave the base to patrol the villages and countryside. Two 3rd Battalion soldiers were killed and one wounded by a roadside bomb shortly after the guardsmen arrived in Afghanistan. Their Afghan interpreter also was killed in the attack.

"My nerves are raw" when they go out on patrol, Dooley said.

"It eats you up inside," Hawkins said.

"We cry sometimes," Wescott said. "I ask God to be with him."

The soldiers drew names from a hat to determine their rotation for their two-weeks leave - Wescott and Dooley came home in September, while Hawkins is due in March.

"As soon as they're home, you're just counting down the days" until they return, Wescott said. "You try to get the most from every minute. At night, I'd lay there, just staring at him, listening to him breathe."

While her husband was home on leave, Dooley videotaped him reading bedtime stories to their 11-month-old daughter, who's now a little confused about her father's whereabouts.

"When I play the tape, she just smiles and pets the [videotape] machine," Jen Dooley said. "She thinks he's electronic. It's kind of pathetic. You just want to cry."

Unlike in World War II when military wives might receive a letter every few months, the guardsmen stay in nearly constant touch by telephone, e-mail and letters.

Kristin Hawkins, though, is the envy of the other wives - her husband has sent more than 200 letters, postcards and packages so far.

But all that letter writing still won't let Hawkins escape one thing when he returns on leave. Like military spouses everywhere, his wife has been doing all the household chores while he's away.

"When Cheyenne has a dirty diaper, I'm just handing her to him," she said, smiling. "I'll tell him, 'Welcome home, daddy. It's all yours.'"