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Normally, I would quietly mourn the passing of October, but I have to say it is getting harder to do each year.

I used to really love October.

I love cool weather, and it is the best month of the year for sports fans.

Then there is Halloween -- monster movies and candy in giant bags. What's not to like?

But, right now I have soured on October because of the incessant political commercials.

In fact, I think I am developing repetitive stress disorder from pressing the mute button.

In the event you did not see a TV, hear a radio or answer your home phone last month, here is how the Republican commercials typically go:

"Bill Blowhard voted 173 times to raise taxes in order to allow illegal aliens to steal your jobs.

"He and his socialist Washington union buddies want to run up a huge debt to import Canadian doctors to take away your guns and use those guns to force dogs and cats to marry unnaturally.

"But you can stop all that by voting for Tim Trueheart.

"He voted to lower your taxes and will defend your Second Amendment rights, punish criminals, and get you a great job. Plus, he was invited to Mark Warner's birthday party.

"He's one of us."

Here is a Democratic commercial:

"Snidely Snipetongue voted 173 times to raise your taxes in order to allow his fat cat buddies to light Cuban cigars with your pension dollars.

"He and his Wall Street corporate banker buddies want to have George Bush balance your checkbook, kick poor kids out of school, and make women quit their jobs and get their bare feet back in the kitchen.

"But you can stop all that by voting for Mike Mangood.

"He voted to lower your taxes and will defend your Second Amendment rights, punish criminals, and get you a great job. Plus, he personally organized Mark Warner's birthday party.

"He's one of us."

Also, they are all moderates who work well with both sides of the aisle, even though the other side of the aisle is clearly a bunch of self-serving heathens taking your money.

They also are all able to spend a lot of time with their families walking down suburban streets for no apparent reason.

Wait a second: Maybe they are about to go meet some underpaid police officers or point at maps with actors dressed as construction workers or read a story to kindergartners in front of an adoring teacher.

And they love wearing regular guy clothes: Unless of course they are appearing in the other guy's ad, in which case they are wearing a suit and tie (like their Washington and Wall Street buddies).

Let's face it folks.

Lowering someone's taxes means raising someone else's because that's how we pay for those police officers and teachers we need but don't have much money to pay for.

Also, nobody wants to or is dumb enough to outlaw guns, and they all better put jobs ahead of any social agenda.

And it's OK if they wear suits because it is professional business attire and that's what we expect.

And, since I doubt they are pumping their own gas or raking their own leaves, I don't think any politician is much like "us," whoever "us" may be.

So, stop calling my house, stop twisting the facts and stop calling each other liars because I am unimpressed.

Instead, please tell me in detail how on Earth you are going to solve these problems, and I promise I will stop hitting the mute button.

Now, can I please have October back?

Sean Kotz is a writer and filmmaker living in Floyd County. You can e-mail him at sean@horsearcherproductions.com