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I have a journalism degree and have spent most of my adult life interviewing people for a living. Politicians, scientists, athletes, criminals, I'm pretty comfortable questioning anybody.

So when my oldest son started kindergarten I did not expect problems getting him to tell me what his school days were like. But he's turned out to be one of the tougher interview subjects I've faced.

Other than saying school is "fine," he doesn't reveal much.

I wanted to learn how to get more information out of him. So I called some experts in child psychology -- the real pros when it comes to interviewing children.

I also thought their suggestions would be timely. Many schools are having their first parent-teacher conferences of the school year. Some expert advice should be useful to parents who want to work with their children on whatever goals are highlighted in those conferences.

All the experts I spoke with agreed that what is probably the most common question --"How was your day?" -- is the classic example of what not to ask a child.

"The answer is going to be one word -- 'good,' 'fine,' 'boring,' 'long' -- which is how a lot of adults would also answer that question," says Kim Gregory, associate professor and head of the early childhood development program at Virginia Western Community College.

A better type of question is open ended and cannot be answered in a single word, she says.

"Think of asking them to tell you about their day," Gregory says. "That can encourage conversation."

Journalists usually do research on their subjects before an interview. Parents who want to get more out of conversations with their children can do so too, says Eric Mesmer, an assistant professor of psychology at Radford University.

"Sometimes schools will send newsletters home," he says. "I as a parent would be sure that I'm reading those. You then have some insight or information coming right from the source. That can prompt some conversations with your child."

It's not only important to know what questions to ask, but when to ask them, says Heidi Hawkins, a nationally certified school psychologist who works for Floyd County Public Schools.

She points out that students may be exhausted by the time their parents pick them up.

"Some kids really need that time after school to just decompress," Hawkins says. "Listen to them before you speak. Sometimes it just comes naturally and they want to talk, so give them the opportunity to talk first and share with you."

When a child does open up, it's important to actually listen to what they are saying and not always interrupt with advice, says Jayne Bucy, an associate psychology professor at Radford, who coordinates the university's psychology training program.

"Try not to fire off a bunch of 'why' questions," she says. "Usually 'why' questions make people defensive."

If a child mentions a problem they are having, such as getting teased, a well-meaning parent might downplay the situation in order to try to put their child at ease, but they shouldn't, Hawkins says.

"Some things that are really tragic to them, we have a different perspective," she says. "We've been there, done that and understand that things go on. But understand that in an 8-year-old's life this is huge."

A good approach when discussing academic or social problems, Hawkins says, is to "brainstorm with your kid to target those areas and come up with a strategy to help them, don't just come up with the answer all the time."

Bucy says parents of busy adolescents should make an extra effort to show they're available to talk.

"If you're always on the phone, or the TV is always on, or you're always on the computer, or they're always on the computer, it makes it difficult," she says.

Some children naturally share information about their day. Others don't.

One way to get both types talking is to gather members of a family together and have everyone take a turn, parents included, Bucy says.

That approach has actually gotten a presidential endorsement. The Obama family reportedly plays a dinner game called Roses and Thorns, in which each member tells something good and something bad that happened to them that day.

I figure if the president can make time for those conversations, I certainly can too. I think I'll give Roses and Thorns a try in my house tonight.

Albert Raboteau is a former Roanoke Times writer who works for Virginia Tech and lives in Blacksburg.