DADLINE: Family roles redefining dad
Today we bring you a special edition of Dadline for Father’s Day. At the end of a long day at the office, I like to go home, loosen the tie, put my feet up, light my pipe, pat the (silent) children on their heads and read the evening paper as my wife emerges from the kitchen and greets me with a peck on the cheek and a scotch on the rocks. The life of a working father can be so hard on a man! OK, so this scene of domestic tranquility is a fabrication. For one thing, I don’t wear a tie to work.
DADLINE: A parents' guide to summer
GREAT AMERICAN BACKYARD CAMPOUT The biggest campout in the United States happens June 22, right in your own backyard. The National Wildlife Federation encourages families to sleep under the stars, commune with nature and, if you are so inclined, raise some money for the federation’s programs. The NWF cites research that has found only one quarter of America’s children play outside every day.
As grandparents, be gentle and know when to back off
Q: Our daughter and son-in-law have consented to be the guardians of our first grandchild, due in a few months. In preparation for this momentous event, we want to understand what our boundaries are. They will be living fairly close and we anticipate seeing them fairly often. When should we give advice and when should we not give advice? If we see them handling something wrongly, should we mention it
Help daughter to love her body, choose comfortable swim attire
Your 11-year-old is embarrassed to wear a swimsuit. Should you encourage her to don one anyway? Parent advice (From our panel of staff contributors): Long-sleeve swim T-shirts are in style and in stores. Similarly, wet suit-style pants to the knee are too. Even the stars wear them. Check out People Magazine. That should solve the problem if her reluctance stems from an unwillingness to show too much skin. But maybe
PMS: A safety guide for men
To the males in my household and all the rest of you: We have arrived, yet again, at that odious interlude of each lunar cycle when there is a small chance that I will throw something heavy at your head. There’s also a chance that during the next three days I will snatch something out of your hands because you are doing it wrong, shriek “WHO ATE THE LAST BROWNIE?”
DADLINE: Preparing teenagers for the driver's seat
Allison Akers is in the market for a black cargo van. She wants a van she can drive to the Starlite Drive-In in Christiansburg, throw open the rear doors, wrap up in a blanket and watch movies such as “World War Z” from the comfort of her very own space. She wants to drive it to Christiansburg High School, where she will be a senior next month. Until she finds
Boy says he hates summer camp. So what?
Q: My 10-year-old son is having a miserable experience at the two-week camp we sent him to. He says he hates it there, that the other kids don’t like him, and the counselor he was assigned to is mean. All this after just two days. He wants to come home. My instinct is to go get him, but my best friend says he’s manipulating me. What should we do? A:
DADLINE: What local parents had to say on their own teenage drivers
A sampling of what some parents told us on Facebook about their own teenage drivers. To read more comments or add your own, go online to www.facebook.com/roanoketimes. We allowed our girls to get their learner’s permit at the appropriate age but they had to keep it for two years before they took driver’s education. We really felt they needed more experience and to grow in maturity before taking on such
Nice daughter might need to learn to set boundaries
Q: Your daughter’s pals always cry on her shoulder. You fear she’s being taken advantage of. Do you step in? Parent advice from staff contributors: Not unless other people’s problems are weighing heavily on her. It’s nice that her friends trust and respect her enough to come to her. It’s good practice for when she has a whiny family of her own. It might be good to let her know
Parents yell because their technique is flawed
“I’m a yeller,” she said, she being the mother of three young children. “No,” I replied, “you’re not. There is no genetic predisposition toward yelling, and no biochemical or neurological condition that makes yelling inevitable much less irresistible.” “But I yell at my kids all the time it seems.” “I’m not arguing with that.” “Well, why then do I yell?” “My best answer, based on experience, is that you yell
Preventing a forgetful but fatal mistake
This column won’t make you laugh. In fact, if you even crack a grin then I’ve done something wrong. But I have to talk about this issue because it haunts me and I need to believe some good will come from airing it. Every year in this country, about 20 infants and young children die after being accidentally left in a car. Not left for 30 minutes while a frazzled
How to deal with parents who post their kids’ personal info online
Your friend posts uncomfortably personal stuff about her kids on Facebook. Should you tell her to stop, for her kids’ sake? Parent advice (from the Chicago Tribune staff): No, don’t tell her to stop. No one likes to be told to stop anything. And, if you do, you then get into a big fight with the friend. But I’d ask, “What does Little Johnny/Janie think of you telling people that?”
Parenting columnist John Rosemond targeted by Kentucky board sues
John Rosemond has been dispensing parenting advice in his newspaper column since 1976, making him one of the longest-running syndicated columnists in the country. But some Kentucky authorities want to put him in a time out. In May, Kentucky’s attorney general and its Board of Examiners of Psychology told Rosemond his parenting column — which regularly offers old-school advice and shows little tolerance for any kind of parental coddling —
Nanny's responsibilities don't include entertaining
A mom asked me a most interesting and currently pertinent question the other day: “How much one-on-one interaction should take place between a nanny and a child under her supervision?” The question is pertinent because increasing numbers of upper-middle-class parents are choosing to use nannies for daily child care instead of or in addition to day care centers and preschools. I will say, up front, that I have no general
How to tell son he’s not getting a car for his birthday
Your son’s pals are getting cars for their 16th birthdays. How do you help him deal with the fact that he’s not? Parent advice (from our panel of staff contributors): “Stall him. Then when the first of his friends gets ticketed or has an accident, just look at your son and nod knowingly.” — Bill Hageman “Yeah, sucks to be you. On the other hand, some kids get lunch buckets
Sign of the times: when good parenting isn't enough
I often hear real-life parenting stories that evoke two equally strong feelings: on the one hand, sorrow; on the other, gratefulness. I am saddened to hear these stories, always told to me by loving parents who have conscientiously tried to always do the right thing, but they also cause me to be glad beyond measure that I am not raising children today. I got out of the game just in
Guest writer this week: Starshine’s son
I asked my 14-year-old son to write my column this week because he was “bored” and couldn’t think of anything to do with his summer besides parking himself in front of back-to-back episodes of “Ancient Aliens” on The History Channel. Yes, it’s really him, and not me pretending to be him. Kid has a sarcastic side; not sure where he gets it. — Starshine Roshell Hi. Judging by my one-word
College sophomore wants parents to take her to Paris
Your college sophomore is upset you’re going to Paris without her. Should you take her along? Parent advice (from our panel of staff contributors): I would. It would be a broadening experience for the kid. And, let’s face it, you’re already on borrowed time in terms of your daughter being able and willing (let alone eager) to spend a significant amount of time with you. Add to those shared
Want to eat in peace? Leave disruptive toddlers at home.
Q: Help! We find it almost impossible to finish a restaurant meal when our 18-month-old twins are along, which is always. We give them toys to keep them busy, and they do well for about 30 minutes after which chaos breaks loose. They begin screaming and throwing things and make it very difficult for us to finish our meal much less enjoy conversation with other adults who may be with
DADLINE: Dads still rule the grill
A couple of weekends ago, several families in my neighborhood got together for the Great American Backyard Campout. Being the great Americans that we are, we pitched tents, pulled up the camp chairs, popped tops on cold beverages and turned the block into a private campground. Naturally, we had a grill on the premises. Two grills, in fact. At one point, my wife pointed out that one of the neighbor
Should you make 5-year-old stick it out in a summer camp he hates?
Your 5-year-old hates the summer camp he’s enrolled in. Is 5 too young to grin and bear it? Parent advice from our panel of staff contributors: On one hand, you don’t want a 5-year-old calling the shots in the household. On the other hand, the kid could have legitimate fears or concerns. One idea might be to contact the camp and get the names of parents who had 5-year-olds go
When marriage is threatened by children
If my parents told me once, they told me at least one hundred times, “Don’t talk to anyone about their religious or political beliefs.” They meant, of course, that those topics are likely to generate tension and angry conflict. As such, they were not the stuff of polite social conversation. Notwithstanding the fact that I find religion and politics to be the two most interesting of all conversational topics, a
1. 41-vehicle wreck ties up traffic Sunday on I-81 in Rockbridge County
2. Virginia Tech football roster has holes on picture day
3. Medicare penalties hit hospitals in Roanoke, New River Valleys
4. Microfestivus beer event gets downtown Roanoke hopping
5. McFarling: 2 little numbers are a big hurdle for Virginia Tech football
6. DAN CASEY: Copter cost still stirring up dust
7. Roanoke farmers markets making local foods more accessible
8. Arrest made in case of missing Nelson County teen
9. Virginia attorney general's office grows under Ken Cuccinelli
10. Man's drowning is 5th in Lynchburg area
THE ROANOKE TIMES
