It reminds her of the good old days, back when the kids were little and frolicked for hours like puppies, when she pushed them in that old swing.

When she couldn't wait for them to grow up so she could have some time to herself.

Looking back years later, VanValkenburg cherishes and even misses those days. She misses them so much she wrote lovingly and longingly about them when The Roanoke Times asked women what advice they would give to their younger selves.

The older and wiser VanValkenburg, 55, wrote a letter to the younger and frazzled mother of three. Her advice: Spend more quality time with your kids.

"Linger longer over bedtime stories and good night kisses," she wrote. "Give them hugs and kisses while at the same time telling them to get tough and that life is not fair rather than holding them at arms length while telling them the same thing. ... Cherish every day with them instead of always looking ahead and thinking about when they would be grown and gone and you'd finally have some peace and quiet and be able to do what you want to do for a change."

Because, she concluded, "now there is much too much quiet at our house and I have way too much peace."

When her three children -- stepdaughter Vicky Kravetsky, 38, and sons David Van Buren, 34, and Shane VanValkenburg, 30 -- were playing sports and involved in school activities, VanValkenburg felt that she was run ragged.

"It seems like we were running all the time," said VanValkenburg, who works as an administrative assistant for a construction company. "But looking back, we really weren't. They were all basically good kids. At times I felt like I wanted hurry up and get them out of the house. Now, I'd say 'Enjoy them while you can.' "

Nostalgia is a common feeling for parents adjusting to an empty nest. The good memories always shove aside the bad. The kids always seem a little sweeter, a little smarter and more lovable -- in hindsight.

VanValkenburg's said her oldest son already looks forward to the days when his own little girl grows up.

"He tells me he can't wait until she's older," VanValkenburg said. "I say, 'No, one day you're not going to wish she was older.' I guess I see a lot of myself in him."

As for the old tire swing, it's getting a lot of use again.

"I have five grandchildren," she said. "All the kids come and play on it."