Thursday, June 12, 2008
What's really important
John Long
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From the RoundTable blog
Here it is graduation season and again no schools have called me to be a commencement speaker. Obviously it's some oversight; maybe the invitations were all lost in the mail. But not willing to deprive the Class of 2008 of my inestimable wisdom, I offer here the text of my prepared speech:
Greetings graduates, faculty and families. I am honored to stand before the Class of 2008 and congratulate you on your many accomplishments. But I hasten to remind you that, although you will soon get a fancy piece of paper that proclaims you to be educated, the truth is you're all a bunch of dunderheads.
Now, don't take offense. I was the same way back in 1985 when I wore that scratchy robe and ridiculous hat. Actually, I was dumber than you. Beef stew north of the eyebrows, but convinced I knew everything. It's the natural condition of an 18-year-old, especially the male of the species.
But the good news is that you don't have to stay that way. You can, if you let yourself, learn a lot over the next few decades. My hope today is to give you a head start by sharing one bit of wisdom which, if you take to heart now, will vastly improve your life and make you a more productive citizen.
Here it is: What you think is important right now really is not.
Let me offer some examples. How about popular culture? You probably swim in it right now, largely unaware of the sewer it is. But almost none of it is of any enduring significance. Take my word for it: It doesn't matter who wins Idol or a daytime Emmy this year. You don't need to see a movie only because everyone else is seeing it. And form your own opinions of music, instead of taking Billboard Magazine's word for what's worthwhile. In fact, turn off your iPod for a while and engage in conversation.
Oh, and mark my words: People will still be listening to Beethoven 500 years from now when something called Nickelback is long forgotten. Give old Ludwig a try.
Another thing that is really not very important in the long run is the opinion of your peers. Now, I don't mean you should live your life with no thought for society's expectations and traditions. Only sociopaths have no care whatsoever for what others think. But you can't be so obsessed with how others view you that you become incapable of making independent decisions, which is the way most teenagers and far too many adults are.
Look around at your fellow graduates. You can probably recite in your sleep the high school pecking order, and you're painfully aware where you stand in it. That girl is popular, that guy is an outcast, he's a computer nerd, she's a wallflower. I've got news for you: In a few years none of it will matter. That nerdy guy will be your boss. The popular dude with the winning smile will be changing your tires. I've seen it happen.
In fact, I hate to break it to you, but in a few years you'll run into some of your classmates, who are the center of your universe right now, and you'll have forgotten their names. And vice versa. So go ahead and let go of high school society now. Don't be the person who comes to the reunion in 20 years tearfully reminding everyone that high school was the best years of your life. You'll make people cringe.
Another thing not nearly as important as you think it is: the present. Here's what I mean: A sign of maturity for you will be your ability to think beyond the moment, to consider the consequences of your decisions on the distant future.
Teenagers live in the moment. I want it now, I don't care what it costs down the road, there might be some hypothetical risks to my decision but it doesn't matter, it can't happen to me. Guess what -- it can. It will. Adults -- which is what you want to be -- try to think of the long-term ramifications of an action. Not as much fun, but far more responsible.
There are other things that aren't as important as you make them -- Facebook comes to mind -- but I'm out of time. So go on out into the real world and get started on maturity. Figure out for yourself what's really important. Hint: it's not Guitar Hero.
Long, a Roanoke Times columnist, is director of the Salem Museum and teaches history at Roanoke College.
