Thursday, September 07, 2006
Want male role models?Stop looking at male teachers with suspicion
From the RoundTable blog
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Rod McGough
McGough, of Salem, works as a day care teacher at Child Care Network and instructional assistant at Cave Spring Elementary School.
Recently we heard of another sad tale of yet another child whose innocence has been lost forever by mistakenly putting faith and trust in a teacher, child care provider and friend. This time it is a 4-year-old boy in one of our local day care centers.
At the same time, the John Mark Karr case has come to national attention. Hometown papers across the country are increasingly reporting the sad news of a child once again molested by a trusted friend or family member. And who can forget the Catholic priest scandals and the Michael Jackson case?
While no one can or should even try to belittle the trauma and lifelong scars that these child victims will bear, I'd like to bring to light the other victims of these crimes as well. I call them the "co-victims." Whether it's an accurate description or not I don't know, but I see them as people who are touched emotionally, psychologically or even spiritually -- either as an individual, as a group or even as a community -- by a crime, in this case, child molestation.
Co-victims are the male teachers, child care providers, civic and church leaders who have given their time and talents toward making a difference in children's lives. Never has it been so difficult in this day and age for a man to offer love and support to the children of our nation due to the ever-increasing eyes of mistrust that see every man as a possible child molester.
Often when it comes to working with children, it's a "help wanted; men need not apply" world. Many have dropped out of the teaching profession, and many young men will think twice of making it a career goal.
Other co-victims are our children, who are often denied the benefits of a positive male role model. In this day and age, where will the fatherless and those from broken homes get the love and attention that only a man can give?
And what about the current joking among children in this day and age. Any show of emotion or affection is deemed "gay." Any mention of a man working with children gets scores of Michael Jackson jokes. What will society be like when these children grow up to be parents? Parents afraid to hug their own children. Parents afraid to say the words "I love you." Children growing up without love -- that will be the next day and age. I'm glad I won't be around to see that.
After my father died, it was a neighbor man who took the training wheels off my bicycle. It was another neighbor man who showed kindness to this fatherless boy and took me fishing. In school, it was a male teacher who told me that he believed in me and that I could accomplish anything. In church it was another male teacher who showed me that there was true joy in serving Jesus. Another man put his faith and trust in me and I became "Mr. Rod" in his day care for years and years, teaching preschool, where I made a difference in the lives of hundreds of children.
I know firsthand how valuable a positive male role model can be. In my own 26 years of working in the child care and education field, I've tried to emulate as much as possible the love and support that I received from men, though it is in this day and age.
I urge all men not to give up their desire to care for and teach the children. Despite it being an age of mistrust, don't let it murder your motivation to use your gifts and talents for the sake of the children.
To all the parents reading this, be ever so vigilant. But please believe me, we're not all child molesters. We're not all that way.
