Thursday, August 31, 2006
It's 2006. Do you know where your kid is?
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Bryce Jorgensen
Jorgensen is a doctoral student in the department of Human Development at Virginia Tech.
MySpace has taken the Internet by storm. Created by Tom Anderson in 2003 in Southern California, MySpace now has 54 million users and has more page views per day than any site on the Web except Yahoo (including Google or MSN).
MySpace is the No. 1 social site on the Internet for teens, and chances are your teenager has a fully developed profile on the site. MySpace allows users to do things like e-mail, write blogs (Web logs), post pictures, music and videos for other users to see and hear, leave comments on friends' pages and view any other MySpace profile at any time.
Like everything else in life, MySpace can either be used responsibly or abused. MySpace can offer many important benefits for teens' socialization and identity development, especially for marginalized youth. At a time when many teens turn from their parents to their peers as their primary source of influence, MySpace opens up a much broader group of peers than was available just a few years ago.
The other side of the coin is that teens are available to a much broader group of child predators and cyber bullies. Many school districts have blocked access to these types of Web sites. Cyber bullies send hateful e-mails, nasty instant messages and create cruel Web pages.
This darker side of MySpace and other such Web sites is what parents mostly hear and fear. Yes, there are potential risks on MySpace, but I believe it is important not to exaggerate them. The few incidents that do happen compared to the 54 million users of MySpace show that using the site is only as risky as online chat rooms. Problems occur when teens post too much personal information, such as phone numbers, home addresses, or school or work locations.
Parents have a great opportunity to discuss with their teens the risks and benefits of sites like MySpace. It is common for adults to react with moral panic when teenagers participate in practices foreign to them.
Not too long ago, adults were cautious and afraid of rock 'n' roll, jazz and television. According to an essay by Danah Boyd on "Why Youth Heart MySpace," teens don't flock to MySpace because of the risks; in their minds, the networking and socialization benefits outweigh the potential harm. Many teens are smart about what information they post and simply ignore any invites from those outside their age group and social network.
MySpace is a fascinating way for teens to build identity, increase their self-esteem, receive feedback and validation from peers, socialize and just hang out. Adults may wonder why teens feel the need to do this online when they could do it in person.
Teenagers want private space. Most of their time is spent at school and other structured activities with adult supervision. Because parents fill their time with so many activities, teens have limited time to simply hang out with their friends. According to teens, it's not the technology that draws youth to spend time online; it's the lack of access to private youth space where they can hang out without adult influences. Digital technologies allow youth to create an alternative private and public space specifically tailored for them. The socializing benefits teens received in the past while hanging out in person are similar to those received by teens hanging out online.
What can we as parents do to combat the possible harm that can come from sites such as MySpace? Some computer experts say the best option for some parents is to use software such as spyware that allows you to track everything that comes in to or goes out of your computer(s). Yet by monitoring teens, they may rebel, go to a friend's home to connect, or use a fake online user name. The goal for parents should be to build a strong relationship of trust with their children so they can freely discuss concerns, ask questions, and allow their teens some private youth space.
Parents also won't be able to keep their children from ever-expanding technologies and new fads. If values have been taught and a relationship of trust has been built where open and honest communication can take place, teens will feel empowered to develop and expand their online relationships while recognizing and honoring their parents' concerns to be careful of the possible dangers. As it states in Proverbs 22:6, "Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is older he will not depart from it."
