Sunday, July 16, 2006
The stigma that can kill
From the RoundTable blog
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Cothran, of Roanoke, is a physical therapist and a moderator for an online post-partum depression support group.
"There but by the grace of God go I." These words echo through my mind as I read details of the retrial of Andrea Yates, currently under way. Although she likely has not been thought of by many since the news blitz surrounding the drowning of her five children more than five years ago, her current trial probably will bring forth again a strong emotional response from the public.
The emotions it evokes in me are profound.
Five years ago in June the horrific Yates tragedy occurred. I remember being justly horrified that someone could commit such an act against her children. And although I disagreed with those who immediately demanded the death penalty, I remember wondering what type of mother could perform such an appalling act, even a mother labeled with a diagnosis of postpartum psychosis.
Just weeks later, I was to undergo an experience that would violently shake my perception.
I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl in June 2001. The next five months of my life became a living hell as I struggled with what was first diagnosed as postpartum depression and then later labeled as postpartum psychosis. Those close to me were stunned as the seemingly stable, highly achieving, optimistic woman that they knew transformed into a stranger riddled with anxiety, self-loathing and fear.
Over those months, I became delusional and required hospitalization and specialized treatments in order to regain my sanity. I am forever grateful that my delusions were limited to myself and did not extend to delusions about my children. I shudder to think that I may have suffered a fate similar to Andrea Yates'. Those who know me would readily agree that I am not a malicious, evil-minded person. Yet, I realize with horror what could have happened while I was in my delusional state.
What my experiences have made me, my family and close friends realize is that the woman they saw in the summer of 2001 was not who I am. Those who were close to Yates, including the father of her children, say the same of her.
I understand the almost compulsive need to pass blame and seek vengeance when innocent children are the victims of a senseless crime. The obvious target for punishment in this tragedy is Yates, as she was the perpetrator. At the time of the act, I would have fully agreed with her permanent imprisonment, believing that she should be severely punished for this crime in the name of the innocents who suffered.
I still believe that the deaths of these children should not be ignored. But my experiences have led me to realize that our actions and energy are misdirected. Yates was not to blame for the deaths of her children. The culprit was postpartum psychosis. Those who feel compelled to point a finger at an animate target should focus on those who perpetuate the stigma associated with mental illness, which hinders individuals from receiving the help they need.
Will the punishment of Andrea Yates prevent similar tragedies from occurring? I suspect that the opposite will occur. Her punishment sends a message that she was to blame for the illness that created the tragedy, and those women suffering from postpartum depression or psychosis likely will be driven further into hiding, not reaching out for the help necessary to prevent tragedies such as this from happening.
Our energy and resources would be better directed toward public education about postpartum mood disorders so that women and their loved ones can be aware of the signs of these illnesses, and toward advocating proper screening of pregnant women and new mothers by their health care providers.
I fear that until the women who are silently suffering sense an atmosphere of support rather than judgment, they will remain in hiding rather than seek out help. And more tragedies may result.
