Saturday, July 05, 2008
How to lose every game and come out winners
From the RoundTable blog
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Betsy Biesenbach
Biesenbach is a freelance writer and a freelance title examiner.
June 26 was designated Rick Bowyer Day by Roanoke City Council. For those who don't know who Bowyer is, he's a 54-year-old insurance salesman, the proud father of a son, and the coach of the winningest losingest baseball team in the Roanoke Parks and Recreation's Little League division.
While our team has never been an athletic powerhouse, this is the first time in six years that we have lost every last game. Think "The Bad News Bears" without the girl, the kid on the motorcycle, the swearing, the drinking, the operatic soundtrack and the Hollywood-style come-from-behind wins. Eight opponents. Ten games. Ten losses.
Of course winning isn't everything, and we parents did our best to encourage our 11- and 12-year-olds.
"It's OK," I'd tell my son. "We're only down by 15, and there's half an inning left. Go get 'em!"
I don't know about the other parents, but by the last game, I was pleading with the baseball gods for a win -- just one stinking win. Was that too much to ask? Apparently so. "Everyone's a winner, everyone's a winner," chanted a child in the stands, the sister of one of the players.
"No, kid," I thought in a brief uncharitable moment. "The winners are the ones who score the most points."
Afterward, Coach Rick thanked the boys for their hard work, encouraged them to practice during the summer and reassured them that they would come back to try again next year.
There were a few long faces, then the boys leapt to their feet, making a mad dash for the snacks. Coach Rick was throwing a pool party for them the next day, and they knew he was planning a banquet, complete with trophies, a cake and a professionally produced video.
And all was right with their world.
Nothing is all bad, of course. In between the fumbles, they played some really good ball. Once, they came within two runs of beating the second-place team.
There were a few players who could be counted on to get a hit or throw a good pitch, but there were no stars on our team. Coach Rick doesn't believe in lobbying aggressively for the best players in the league. He'll take anyone who will sign up and show up and be a good sport. He plays them all at whatever position they choose.
We didn't practice as much as the other teams because most of the boys were honor roll students or involved with music lessons, Scouts and church. Those activities were as important or more important than baseball, Rick explained. I suspect that's why we lost.
And I also know that's why we won.
When my son began playing T-ball, a friend warned me to be prepared for the inevitable day when he wouldn't be "good enough."
Each year, there would be fewer teams, she explained. The serious players would let the ones who were there just for fun know that they didn't belong. They would be weeded out before they were 12, and there would be disappointment and tears.
I guess no one ever told our kids that. Sure, they get ribbed by boys from the other teams at school, but they don't seem to mind.
"We're all friends, Mom," my son explained, exasperated.
They almost seem to relish their status as kings of the bottom of the heap. And they truly love playing. Whenever they're together, they're catching and throwing and hitting, like kids used to do in neighborhood pickup games a generation or two ago.
The coaches don't yell at them and the parents are still thrilled when they catch the silly ball, never mind get it to a base on time.
And they care about each other. Losing every game sounds like a sure recipe for fights, insults and hard feelings. But there are none. Instead, they quietly support and encourage each other, even when the going gets tough.
They owe that to Coach Rick, who has taught them that "it's not whether you win or lose but how you play the game" is more than an empty platitude. They may have lost, but they played with grit and guts and grace.
He also taught them that there's always another day, another game. And so the GSAA Twins -- the winningest losingest team in the league -- will be back again next year. And what does that mean? Bad News for everyone else! No matter what the score.
